Dear Grace...

I seem to always have these sexual thoughts. Every other guy I know seems to have “done it."  I am 19 and living on my own. Is sex before marriage really that wrong?

Mac

Dear Mac,

You are a sexual being, designed, created and loved by God. 

Guardrails along roadways are there to protect passengers by stopping vehicles before they go in the ditch, or worse, over the edge. Because of God's great love for you, His words are like guardrails to protect you in the area of sex. He doesn’t want you hurt or to suffer the consequences of bad choices about sex. You have a great opportunity to get this love, sex and dating thing right the first time, when you choose to be wise. Dating and sex are not meant to be recreational sports. Love is not sex. Dating a girl is about getting to know her and it is learning and refining the skills in Galatians 5:22-23 (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control).

We live in a very sexually-charged society. In 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 Paul gives a one-word answer to those who wrestle with sexual temptation—“Flee.” Put on your runners and run far away from those images or situations that tempt you. While it seems like every other guy is "doing it," in reality there are many, both girls and guys, who have chosen not to—a difficult and challenging choice requiring self-control and discipline. Surround yourself with like-minded people. 

Be wise, trust God and choose purity. Then you may experience a marriage that is truly blessed.

Grace